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Fap 5 Friday (May 8) with Our Pal Jesse

By: Gram Ponante


This week we present you a wonderful smorgasbord in our Fap 5, including the return of a beloved entertainer, a history lesson, a Skinemax movie that you don’t feel guilty about jerking off to and, well, two movies about the anus.

Follow along as Playboy Radio’s Lexi Stetzel delivers the week’s most popular movies as determined by Gamelink customers.

Perhaps our Number Five sounds like any generic Skinemax movie until, of course, you find no mention of the word “bordello” and there are no shots of women drinking white wine. Also, there’s come on their faces:

LUST UNLEASHED

Gamelink Fap 5 It’s “Lust Unleashed” and Guess what? “Lust and passion are unleashed in this erotic collection that is filmed in the highest quality for you viewing pleasure.” That’s what it says on the

It’s “Lust Unleashed” and Guess what? “Lust and passion are unleashed in this erotic collection that is filmed in the highest quality for you viewing pleasure.” That’s what it says on the box cover of this two-and-a-half-hour fuckfest featuring Ella Milano on the cover. Those tasty cookies I get at the gas station when I’m driving all night? Those are also called Milanos. But they don’t make me feel the way Ella Milano does.

It’s “Lust Unleashed” and Guess what? “Lust and passion are unleashed in this erotic collection that is filmed in the highest quality for you viewing pleasure.” That’s what it says on the box cover of this two-and-a-half-hour fuckfest featuring Ella Milano on the cover. Those tasty cookies I get at the gas station when I’m driving all night? Those are also called Milanos. But they don’t make me feel the way Ella Milano does.

Number Four is like the history lesson Ken Burns was too scared to tell you about: It’s:

JOEY SILVERA’S TRUE HISTORY OF SHE-MALE COCK NUMBER FOUR

Gamelink Fap 5

We honestly don’t understand the implication that every OTHER movie must be a FALSE history of She-male Cock, but we shouldn’t focus on the title too much. Like, when you watched “The Avengers,” did you really worry about how old Ultron was? So in the same way you shouldn’t try to guess the age of Ultron (because he’s vain), you shouldn’t wonder why this is called “The True History of She-male Cock” (because even she-male cocks have veins). 

Our Fap 5 Threeway travels to Liberal San Francisco for a tender coming of age movie:

THE UPPER FLOOR: ADRIANA CHECHIK FUCKED IN THE ASS FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME

Gamelink Fap 5

Isn’t that sweet? Frankly, I had no idea that Adriana Chechik, a very dirty girl, hadn’t been fucked in the ass before. Sometimes just looking at someone you can guess if they’d been fucked in the ass or not. I have a feeling that this wasn’t really Ms. Chechik’s first time, but if you’re going to get your anal cherry popped ON FILM for the first time, there is no better place to do it than the Upper Floor of Kink.com’s Armory in San Francisco. That place is classy when you wanna get assy. 

We now come to Number Two, which is about the ass, too. To, Two, Too: Keep doing verbal gymnastics like that and EVERYONE’s gonna give up the A.

JAY SIN’S ANAL ACROBATS NINE

Gamelink Fap 5

We always get a little thrill when Number Two concerns the butt. It’s a sign that everything is working as it should. Jay Sin gets down and dirty in a porn star’s dirtiest of places which, if you really want to go there, is way cleaner than most other people’s. Think about it: Porn stars have very hygienic asses. Take a hint, America!

Finally, our Top of the Faps this week features the return after two years of porn’s most famous blonde from Oklahoma:

JESSE: ALPHA FEMALE

Gamelink Fap 5

You might have to get used to not adding the “Jane” because our friend isn’t legally allowed to perform under that name anymore, but Jesse is back and looking really good after a 2-year contractually-obligated break, starring in her first film for Jules Jordan. She looks great and this movie features footage captured by a DRONE, which is like a Patriot Act in your pants. 

Gram Ponante

About Gram Ponante

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The editor of Naked Truth, Gram Ponante has been writing about pornography since 2002, though he never expected to get more than three months of material out of it. Since then, he has edited and/or contributed to adult industry trade magazines AVN and XBiz, Hustler, Fleshbot.com, and dozens more classy publications. He has written for the great Gamelink since 2006. Gram regularly speaks about issues facing the adult industry — both entertaining and grim — at colleges and conferences, and has published several popular eBooks about his time as America's Beloved Porn Journalist.